Bitcoin Classic is splitting off

Updated: March 26, 2017

At the time of this writing, the Bitcoin butthurt index is off the charts. After years of astroturfing and fudding, it became clear that some people only understand binary arugments and need the secure feeling of putting people into a compartment. Here are the two compartments mapped out by Bitcoin Classic:

•Those who want to upgrade Bitcoin in a secure way with a lot of testing and peer review: A blocksize increase via Segwit softfork which would solve some malleability issues and allow for more layers to be built on top of bitcoin.

•Those who want to upgrade bitcoin via hardfork only and use the blocksize “debate” as a means to fire the core dev team. The only way to scale is to change a number, for example a 1 to a 20.

There are not any more nuances to this debate, you are either with us, or against bitcoin.

Since we are tired of getting thrown under the bus with the BU technical problems we have decided to split. We can move on and will not have to deal with a possible new president of bitcoin.

What Bitcoin Classic will offer:

•A return to the Bitcoin from a year ago. No high fees and no more stuck transactions and a free unicorn for every bitcoin classic user.
•A predictable and centraly planned cryptocurrency with a clear vision: We will follow our leadership rank and file.
•An open, inclusive community without censorship of any form, jihadists welcome.
•The ability to pay for your cocaine through bitcoins peer to peer cash system.

On a more practical level, here’s what’s going to happen:

•On June 1st 2017, we will hard fork this shit to the real deal bitcoin chain. No more of this poser shit. We are putting up and forking this shit. Everyone who has Bitcoins at that point, will get the same amount of Classic coins for free. With the real deal classic you get 1 BTC classic with every BTC you own plus a unicorn. This will reduce your risk when you move to the real blockchain.
•Merge mining will be implemented on launch! Miners can mine Bitcoin Classic for free and still get to mine the old crap chain too. Since everyone likes free stuff this will bring the best outcome for miners. No risk just mine the real bitcoin too.
•replay protection, we have you covered. No more fence sitting BU style.
•On shitcoin exchanges we will be: BCL and XBC

Trading Bitcoin Classic:

•You wont be able to trade Bitcoin Classic untill after the fork on June 1st 2017. We are already in touch with bitfinex and they will list BCL later this week. You should be able to bet on BCL at some sportsbooks and bucketshops.

FAQ (Classic)

Q: Yo, How big dem blocks?
A: Sheeeeet 8MB we goin BIIIGG.
Q: Hey why you up on my nodes, yall need your own right?
A: We are taking a close look at the fuctions of nodes and how the impact the network in relation to the blocksize limit debate and the economic majoirty that is showing a move to SPV wallet solutions in which we indeed to make this the new standard.

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Image Credit “the simpsons”